A Real Personal Ass-istant

Uh-oh! Suggestiveness!

Pump it! Pump it!

Not like the Black-eyed Peas, bitch--

Pump it for REAL!

Stop distracting me! You know why you're really here!
Look at my spectacular bod, boy!

I'm in position! Why won't you tend to me!

Some 'personal trainer' you are.

I'm gonna keep somethin' up for ya, ya

cock-tease! Right up under the other big bar here.

Gonna have to get rough since you won't

notice my glutes. You couldn't guess my

super powers, bitch; it's having the most

perfectly rounded ass in the hero game!

Get ready for a mooning!

***

Crack of the Moon

What is Marvel's own Moon Knight's greatest weapon?

Is it his once-treasured Khonshu moon-god powers?

Or his Huston-imposed brutality and viciousness?

Perhaps it's that big ol' billy club he carry?

No, his greatest ass-et is the splendorous way

that the lovely white spandex conforms to

his own tighty-whity, parting those glorious

cheeks and driving even the most breederific of

opponents to distraction!

Come on Marc...let's see a Full Moon!

***